Thursday, November 20, 2008

Madonna Does Her Best Oscar The Grouch Impersonation

It is clear that I don't like Mandonna. It's clear why I hate her as well. 1. she is a really ugly man who is living as a really ugly woman. In my opinion there is enough ugliness in the world without her having to add to it. 2. She is snooty in a really trashy sort of holier than thou eat my organic shit sort of way. 3. She's ugly.

So...why does she have to taunt me further with wearing dresses like these? WHY? I mean, WHO wears astro turf? WHO!!!!!????!!!!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Did You Know Polar Bears Think Doggies Are Play Toys?

Just found this video of Polar bears having a good old time playing with dogs. Has got to be some of the cutest footage ever.

Kitty Can Haz Super Stealth!

I nearly choked on my jawbreaker when I saw this one...

Monday, November 17, 2008

Friday, November 14, 2008

Seperated At Birth?

What Can I say...James Hetfield so is the Cowardly Lion

Amy Winehouse Is Bat Shit Crazy

I don't know why I keep posting photos of Amy Winehouse. I's sad. Like...sad that she went from...well, just mildly cracked out to complete crack ho eating their own poop sort of crazy. You know?

And I have to ask...WTF is up with her troll feet? This is the second photo I've seen where she is wearing those ballet shoes and her foot is curled down like some freak hawk talon. you know? Its just not sexy... maybe her having sexy feet is moot at this point, but lord...why does she have to make it worse?

Your Friday Monica Bellucci Post

Monica Bellucci, our resident goddess of fleshly delights, has been quoted as saying:
“I love the idea that when a man pays to see one of my films, he’s paying me to feel pleasure,” News of the World quoted her, as saying.

Monica admits that being in front of the camera makes her shed her inhibitions as quickly as her clothing.

“When I am acting, it’s like I’m in a trance.” She added, “You do things you would never do normally. You don’t feel cold — even if you are naked.”

I have to honestly say that I don't know if I could have gone on with my life if Monica had said she'd never get naked again. I mean...what would be the point? It'd be like eating your frosted flakes without milk... or your Wendy's frosty without the fries. Where is the fun in that?

For my yummy photos, head over to F-Listed

Thursday, November 13, 2008

My Sappy Pussy Post Of The Day

This had got to be the cutest kitten alive...

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Plastic Surgery Gone Wrong...Seriously Wrong

Hang Mioku, of Korea, apparently was so addicted to plastic surgery that she took to injecting...
...COOKING OIL into her damn face. Um...WTF? Take a gander at what she looked like before the addiction took hold. She was a hottie...seriously. The doctors who aided her (and there were many) should be shot...someone should have put her away looooong ago. cupboard...with a lock. The photo with split screen is one of Hang before her "reconstructive" surgery...and after. I'm not sure yet...but Ithink she is fugly in I would have just left the face as is. At least before she just looked like a really fat person...afterwards she looks freakishly disfigured. ugh...

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Holy Mary!! Someone Kill It!!

I don't ask for much in life. I don't expect to have a perfect day or everything go my way. I do hope for days that are not full of photos of Amy Winehouse. I nearly lost my lunch when I saw these photos of her today. What in gawd's name is wrong with this girl? Since when did wearing hospital ID bracelets as fashion become cool? Never. She is insane...cracked out...or both. Yeah, mostly likely both. Whatever happen to the good old days when you were coked up or cracked out you still died being cool? maybe that is a myth...but hey...can you take her Halloween mask off now? Its very nearly Thanksgiving and I wont be able to eat my turkey gizzards with her scaring me every time I surf the net for irrelevant news.

Oh, and P.S. Tell her to clean her frickin' nails already!

Harrison Ford Tries To Dance...Fails

Men should age gracefully...and for the most part, Harrison Ford has been doing that rather well...that is, until I saw this photo of him at Prive nightclub in Las Vegas. His sexy meter just went down about 6 or 7 notches.

Rebecca Romijn Looks...Scary

Is it just me, or does Rebecca Romijn look faintly like some demon taken Satan baby bearing vessel? Don't get me wrong, she is still a very scary "rosemary's baby" sort of way. WTF is up with her eyes? Did she chew the peyote before the shoot?

Monday, November 10, 2008

Mischa Barton WTF?

I beseech you unruly stars of ill fated fashion choices. Invest in mirrors...invest in stylists who don't offer to wipe your ass with their tongues. Why in gawd's name is Mischa wearing a freakin' feather duster??

Joe Scarborough Drops the F-Bomb on Live TV

Friday, November 7, 2008

I Just Puked In My Mouth A Little...

This is just freakin' wrong. If this woman wasn't exploiting her massive ass, I'd feel sorry for her. I think she suffers from Lymphoedema (see inset photo for example), I could be wrong, but I THINK she one has an ass that big and lives to tell the tale....

Ok, One More Monica Bellucci Post

Just for the Hell of it, here are the latest images of Monica Bellucci in the latest issue of Italian GQ. I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again....why does she have to be so damned beautiful? It's painful. *sigh*

Mr. Skin's Top 5 Monica Bellucci Nude Scenes

It is time again for our worship of Brain Dump's resident Goddess, Monica Bellucci. Mr Skin has put together a top 5 countdown of her all time best nude scenes. It it worth viewing solely for the fact that you can ogle her bouncy bits! Click here for the video goodness

WTF Was Beyonce Thinking?!

I just found this pic of Beyonce at the MTV Europe Music IS SHE WEARING??? I'd be screaming like that if someone caught me in that tin man costume. Again, I have to ask...where the hell were her handlers? She has a stylist right (her mom doesn't count)? This isn't effing style...this is dog crap. Wait no, this is worse than dog crap. This is kitty skitters.

In case any of you wanted to see this contraption in motion...

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Polish Music Videos Are Naughty

I found this video of Polish wannabe singer Danuta Lato today on Dlisted. My first thought upon seeing it was "OMG, they just showed her massive tits". My second thought was "My husband would probably like watching this". So I'm posting it for mass pleasure.

She apparently had some music hit in the 1980's, hence the music video seen here. Did anyone else know it was okay to show mondo titties in music videos in Poland?

Your Helpful Facial Hair Guide

I love facial hair. My very own husband has some of the best facial hair around. What I don't like is facial hair that is unkept or just plain fugly. How will you know what constitutes bad facial hair? Here are some easy rules to follow

1. The Porntasche - You don't want this hairy piece of work adorning your upper lip. When is it okay to actually have a porntasche....well, maybe only if you really do work in porn...and even then your female fans will hate you.

2. The Mutton Chops - Unless you are trying out for a part to play the next Wolverine, then don't have these. I hate these. Men who wear these damn things look like their face is covered in so much skin oil that their beards would leave grease marks on your lapels. Its horrid and nasty.

3. The I Just Don't Give A Shi'ite Beard - Sometimes this look can work (see Russell Crowe). In most cases this look will have people wondering if you're alcoholic, suicidal, or both.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Zac Efron is SO freakin' gay!

I don't hate gay people. I applaud them. My cousin is gay, and trust isn't an easy road to plow (pun intended). What I hate are these quasi straight guys (see photo inset of Zac "I want king sized wiener in my ass" Efron) prancing around Hollywood with their beards (see photo of Efron's Girlfriend "beard" Vanessa Hudgens here) acting like they are cool with the poon when we ALL know they are lusting for the peen.
You cannot be THAT groomed as a man and still want your tube steak smothered in fish sauce. It isn't possible. Being that groomed means you haven't seen a vagina since birth...and it's by choice. I'm not saying he is ugly. No...he is handsome in a really disturbing 1950's mannequin sort of gay way. Dude...he needs to man up. If he IS straight...he needs to drop wearing the make-up. No one has skin as perfect as that...the maybelline just has to stop.

If you want to do the "metro" thing, try takinga que from our resident sexy metro male, Ed Westwick... You cant go wrong with a smug grin, slightly rumpled suit...and a 5 o'clock shadow. While the slightly gay haircut might keep us guessing on your sexual preference, the rest of your get up sends "sex me up" signals and usually our X chromosones will respond accordingly and we will worship your hairy nads.

When Stupid People Do Stupid (funny) Things